Oh my God, this. You have to make your life better, don’t rely on a fucking calendar.
The New Year gives people hope, they see it as a chance to start over, new, afresh, to make better their lives. People are excited because 2010 could finally be the year that they achieve everything they’ve every wanted.
Personally I think New Years is a ridiculous holiday.
I claim to be pretty well balanced mentally and emotionally, I believe it most of the time as well. But one thing I never understood was calling him the next day apologizing for something he should be apologizing for. This is how the scenario goes:
He fucks up, bullshits around the subject, get’s caught, gives half ass apology, then proceeds to get mad because i’m mad.
I tell him to piss off, don’t answer the phone, reply back to texts, give myself a night to calm down, wake up the next morning sick to my stomach, panic, call back and apologize to him in the most concerning tone possible.
Sometimes I feel like love is a bomb strapped on to me, I hear the tic then toc and then count down until I finally lose my complete mind. I know it’s a brilliant feeling to have when you fall in love, and everything tastes a bit sweeter, colors a lot more brighter, but with that a bit of your own personal sanity goes away.
Love drove me to rehab, granted that rehab was moving 5 states away from him and blogging to the world, but when I think back to the time that I was in love - It was absolutely maddening.
My heart made all the decisions and my mind took the backseat.
it’s not just you, it’s everyone. we’re all a little insane. take comfort in that I suppose, I don’t know what else to say.
“I want a trip inside your head, spend the day there, hear the things you haven’t said, see what you see. I wanna hear you when you call, do you feel anything at all? I wanna see your thoughts take shape and walk right out.”—(via brandydarling) (via ghostgrl)
I gazed securely upon him, afraid that he would notice. As my fingertips softly ran over his skin, he moved slowly, but he did not open his eyes; he was too tired. Shivers were send down my spine by just looking at him; he did some things to me that just weren’t healthy anymore. When I was with him, I changed into a completely different person; I canged into him. I could see the way he did, hear the way he did, feel the way he did, and I loved it. I just couldn’t get enough of it. Couldn’t get enough of him. He was so beautiful, and he seemed just so vulnerable while he was sleeping. Suddenly, I felt strong, like I could protect him from anything and anyone, like my love could destroy buildings, could do everything so he wouldn’t be in pain. My lips touched his skin tenderly, and for one single moment, I felt like I could fly. Suddenly, his eyes opened. I looked away immediately, ashamed for what I was doing, but I could hear him giggling, saying: ‘Ahw, you’re so cute!’ ‘No I’m not!’ ‘Yes you are! You’re perfect.’ ‘No, really, I’m not! Besides, nobody is perfect.’ He took me into his arms and whispered: ‘Yes, darling, you really are. It are all the little imperfections together that make you perfect. So, what can I do to make you believe you are?’ Softly, I pushed him away. While looking him straight in the eyes, I said: ‘Kiss me.’ So he did. It was genuinely the best moment of my life.